I was doing so great not thinking about things, and then suddenly, it all came back to me, and I was completely overwhelmed. I got pissed off and started to cry. I think the reason that I'm so overwhelmed is because he's the first guy I've ever really liked, not a casual fling. Sure, I've liked guys before, but they were little crushes. I usually thought a guy was "so cute" or "just the sweetest" or "so funny", but I know this guy on a level I don't think I'll know anyone on. It's the weirdest story, and it's also the longest. He makes me want to better myself, but I thought he liked me just the way I was. So crazy. My head is reeling and I can't think of anything else, so that's all I talk about, and right after the words come out of my mouth, I regret having said them. He's all i talk about and it's annoying the fuck out of me. Someone save me from myself.